Teen Titans in Kaamelot
by Soulasylum
Summary: While King Robin begins the great Holy Grail quest, Raven has to take care of Jump Kingdom... Huho...
1. Goodbye Marylou

Titans in Kaamelot

_Hello there This is my first attempt at writing an english fanfiction it's a bit weird for me so sorry for the future mistakes I'll certainly do._

_So… Here is a Teen Titans story which settles in the Arthur and the Grail's context… Except one thing : It's not Camelot here… It's Kaamelot. Unfortunately, Teen Titans and Kaamelot are nor my properties… But I claim the insanity of this story _

_Ah yeah… About the pairing… For the moment, noone, but I foresee a RavenXStarfire Oh and… Polnareff rocks !_

**GOODBYE MARYLOUUUUUUUUUUU…**

« _Mind your manners, The Round Table is not a barbecue !_ »

**Arthur** – Kaamelot

King Robin, monarch of Jump, was pacing in the castle of Kaamelot. He wasn't exactly in a good mood : The Lady of the Lake just contacted him once again and urged – well… Screamt in fact – him to find the Holy Grail. It was the fourth time since the beginning of the week and he was a bit stressed.

_--- FLASHBAAAAAAAAAAAACK ! ---_

« WHY THE HELL ARE YOU AND YOUR SCRAWNY ASS NOT OUT SEARCHING THE DAMN CUP ?! »

He reached his throne, his head spinning. The Lady of the Lake – more known amongst the mortals as "Blackfire", or… Hum… Less polite nicknames – had one more time threatened him to make him eat his own intestines. He was by now used to her antics - Heck ! He managed to survive her for 3 years now ! – but her high pitched voice just drove him and his eardrums completely insane.

« My dear Lady, he tried to answer, be certain that I didn't forget my holy quest but…

But ? Her voice lowered to a dangerous tone.

Huh, Robin continued, well… In fact, I have problems with barbarian invasions and particularly the burgonde Slade.

So, Blackfire calmy said while walking to him, you, King Robin, champion of the gods and owner of Excalibur, you, who lead the Knights of the Round Table, you can't take care of some PATHETIC LITTLE BUMS ?!

It's not that simple, he cringed, this Slade is helped by powerful warriors and magicians…

I. Don't. Give. A. DAMN ! About it. Ever you begin your quest, ever you'll have to worry about something more scary than some stupid hicks. Capish ?

Yes, Ô Great Lady of the Lake.

Good boy. Now pack your things and go get the damn thing.

Yes sir. »

_--- END OF THE FLASHBAAAAAAAAAAAACK ! ---_

Robin didn't have any choice, so he grabbed his dear Excalibur, some foods and hurried to his horse. Before exiting Kaamelot, he managed to write a note to his lieutenant, Raven. He grimaced while thinking about the enchantress, she wouldn't be very happy about the whole thing but what other person would be more suited to take the lead while he was away ?

Cyborg ? He was the strongest knight but he lacked a lot of presence and seriousness.

Beast Boy ? Ha ha ha…

Not funny.

No, Raven was fine for the job : She was scary, intelligent, very scary, diplomatic when needed, very very scary, powerful, oh and… Very very very scary.

Robin sighed and headed to the doors of the castle. It was going to be a looooooong trip.

END

_Kaamelot_a very funny French TV show, parody of the Cycle of Arthur

_burgonde_german people, from Scandinavia, in Kaamelot, Burgondes tend to have problems with Arhtur and always invade his land.


	2. Little Green Bag

Titans in Kaamelot

_Hey Second chapter in line. I'm listening right now George Baker, it's just… DAMN GOOD :D_

_Teen Titans and Kaamelot were not my properties the last time I checked and recheck nope… Always not mine_

_Do you know Karadoc of Kaamelot ? Most times, he's with his buddy, Perceval, in the nearest tavern. The two of them are just completely dumb-asses, they rock ! There is also this another famous quote from dear Kara : "I'm not mad ! I had a quetsch flan ! »_

**LOOKIN' BACK ON THE TRACK FOR A LITTLE GREEN BAAAAAAG**

_« In Vannes too, we have our traditions. Well, no Grails, but I know an old man who walks around with a salad bowl. » _

**Karadoc** – Kaamelot

While King Robin was beginning his holy quest, the enchantress Raven was slowly waking up in her comfy queen-size bed – Don't joke about it, BB already tried : that's why he's green now – hugging her little red doll named "Rage". Of course, no one knew about this particular fact, or else she would be forced to kill and destroy anything and anyone in the kingdom of Jump. And that would be very sad because where the hell would she be able then to find tea ?!

How sad, really…

Raven stretched a little but decided to rest a little more : King Robin would take care of Slades and other barbarians. Damn, the knights of the Round Table would at least do something of their 10 fingers, right ? She was a bit tired since she defeated the dragon Malchior. Of course, King Robin was the one who got all the cheers and she really didn't care : in fact, she was a bit scared of people but of course she would never recognized it, it was easier to scare everybody.

So, Raven was hugging her dear Rage, half dreaming, when suddenly something green just crashed in the middle of her room, breaking her door in the same time.

« WE ARE IN DEEP SHIT !!!! »

Fortunately, the enchantress was able to hide Rage before Beast Boy discovered her dirty secret.

« ENCHant… Huh… Ress ? Said the knight before turning a strange shade of yellow while seeing four very angry glowing eyes looking at him. »

He gulped and began to tremble.

« Yes ? Came the rasped voice of Raven.

We… Huh… Have a big problem.

So… Why not talking about it to the right person, _a.k.a_ King Robin ?

That's part of the problem, Great Enchantress. »

Beast Boy managed to strangle a yelp as the four eyes half closed and black energy appeared around Raven, swirling around the female body.

« Explain.

It seems our king just decided to huh… Begin the great quest to find the Holy Grail. »

The four eyes blinked.

« What ?! Raven nearly shout.

Here's the note, the knight said, showing a post it where it was – horribly – written : _Yop Raven, have to find Grail, take care of Jump. King Robin._"

Beast Boy managed to run away before hell decided to break loose.

Deep in the Abyss, a lonely demon cheered :

« _That's my girl ! _»

After one hour of pure destruction, Raven calmed enough to regain control on her powers. While Beast Boy was hidden somewhere, Cyborg, second knight of the Round Table, was helping the king's substitute, Enchantress Raven, with her new duties.

« Slade is not the major problem for the moment, he explained while Raven sat on the throne. We had recently some incidents with the rural population.

What do they want ?

In fact… We do not understand their demands : they just attacked the garrison without any warning.

Then go get their leaders. I want to talk to them.

Yes, Enchantress. »

Raven had time to try a little the crown. _Not bad…_ She used her magic to grab some small cushions because the damn wood throne was already breaking her delicate behind. How, by her demon father, can King Robin be able to sit all the day on this tool of torture in disguise ?

Few minutes later, the knight returned, with two poor men in each hand. Raven adjusted her hood, letting only her scary eyes in the light. The first one was big and old with a grey mustache, the other, younger, was lanky. The two of them just stank as if they never took a bath, which was probably true.

« So ? She asked with her calm and rasped voice, trying to ignore the fool smell. What's with attacking the guards ?

We want to talk to the King, they said in unison.

King Robin is absent for the moment, so you'll have to talk to me and, by the way, there is no "want" here or I'm going to decorate this room with your insides. Understood ?

Huh… yes, Ô Great Enchantress.

Good. So ? What does the agrarian population wish ?

Huh ?

I'm talking to you, country bumpkins.

Well, began the older, we have social demands.

Which are ? »

The two hicks stayed suddenly silent and stared at each other. Raven was inwardly chanting « Azarath… Metrion… Zinthos… » while her patience sang goodbye to her ears.

« Well… We don't know for the moment, said the lanky, but you know, there are these things about proletarian revolutions, the power for the oppressed people, Lenine guy and all the trimmings.

Yeah ! The other one continues with more enthusiasm, and we'll hang the last boss with the guts of the last priest !

And, Raven asked with a calm voice, how do you exactly intend to hang me, because, may I remind you, I'm currently the boss of Jump ? »

Silence.

Four eyes glowing red.

« OUT NOW ! Raven barked. »

The hicks managed to set the first running record of Jump. Raven sighed and tried to seek comfort in the wood throne. _Needs more cushions…_ Cyborg cleared his throat nervously.

« Enchantress, now we need to discuss on the Round Table's affairs.

Ok. At least it can't be worst than the hicks."

Cyborg chose wisely not to warn Raven.

END

_a lonely demon_ Come on, you know who it is… It begins with a "tri" and ends with a "gon".

_we'll hang the last boss with the guts of the last priest !_ Personal joke


End file.
